Responding to Hurt with Grace

In Genesis 50:19-21, we are invited to pause and reflect on one of the most powerful demonstrations of grace in Scripture. Joseph’s words to his brothers—who had once sold him into slavery—are not laced with bitterness or vengeance. Instead, they are grounded in humility. He recognizes that judgment belongs to God, not man. This is the first step in responding to hurt with grace: releasing the need to retaliate.

·      Grace begins when we surrender our right to revenge.

      ·      Healing starts when we acknowledge that justice is God’s domain.   

                  ·        Peace flows when we choose humility over pride.

“Ye meant evil against me; but God meant it for good…” — Genesis 50:20

Joseph does not sugarcoat the past. Joseph is not minimizing or excusing the betrayal of his brothers. They plotted against him, sold him into slavery, and tore him away from his family. Their intentions were rooted in jealousy, resentment, and malice.

He names the evil. But he also names the redemption. This is the second step in responding with grace: reframing the pain through the lens of God’s purpose.

• Grace does not deny the wound—it transforms it.
• Grace sees beyond the intention to the outcome.
• Grace trusts that God can weave good from even the darkest threads.

Joseph’s ability to see divine purpose in human betrayal is not naïve—it’s prophetic. It’s the kind of vision that only comes from walking closely with God through suffering.

“…but God meant it for good…”

Here lies the transformative power of divine perspective. Joseph shifts the lens from human intention to divine orchestration. Though his brothers intended evil, God repurposed their actions to fulfill a greater plan.

• God’s sovereignty: Nothing escapes His control—not even betrayal.
• Redemptive purpose: God can use even the darkest moments to bring about light.
• Spiritual maturity: Joseph sees beyond the pain to the providence.

Let’s look at these a little deeper:

1. Recognize the Wound Without Becoming It

Joseph didn’t pretend his brothers hadn’t hurt him. He named their actions as evil. But he didn’t let their betrayal define his identity or dictate his response. You are not what was done to you. You are what you choose to become in response.

Grace begins where bitterness ends.

2. Trust That God Is Working Behind the Scenes

Joseph saw a divine thread running through his suffering. When life feels unfair or when betrayal cuts deep, pause and ask: What might God be doing through this? You may not see the full picture yet, but faith means trusting that the tapestry is being woven—even when all you see are tangled threads.

God doesn’t waste pain. He transforms it.

3. Release the Right to Retaliate

Joseph had every earthly right to punish his brothers. Instead, he chose mercy. He refused to play God, and in doing so, he reflected God.  When you’re tempted to lash out, remember Joseph’s question: “Am I in the place of God?” Let go of revenge. Let God be the judge. Your role is to be a witness of grace.

Forgiveness isn’t a weakness, it’s spiritual strength.

4. Respond with Active Compassion

Joseph didn’t just forgive—he nourished. He comforted. He spoke kindly. He became a source of healing to those who had once harmed him. Can you bless someone who’s hurt you? Maybe it’s a kind word, a silent prayer, or a simple act of generosity. Grace isn’t just about letting go—it’s about reaching out.

The highest form of grace is love in action.

 ------

Pastor Godwin, FBC Danvers